Watermelon Basil Margarita
- 1 750-milliliter bottle silver tequila (in this margarita, the better the tequila, the better the drink. Try Herradura, El Tesoro, El Viejito, Patron, or practically any of the 100% agave tequilas that are available in the market)
- 8 ounces simple syrup
- 8 ounces watermelon schnapps
- 1 positive outlook on your future
- 16 basil leaves
- 0 baggage from unsuccessful relationships with loser guys
- 8 cups fresh watermelon chunks Watermelon wedge (or 3 watermelon seeds), for garnish
- 8 ounces fresh lime juice
This recipe will wow your foodie friends and make those that are watching their figures feel that they are making a good choice even though there are likely just as many, if not more empty calories in this particular recipe than the traditional margarita. But who really cares – the melon sounds healthy.
This is a nice accompaniment to a spicy protein packed snack like a bean tostada. Heat up a small iron skillet and drop a tiny drop of Olive oil on corn tortilla, place in warm pan and drop 2 tablespoons of refried black beans on tortilla and cover with second tortilla. Heat each side to a crispy crunch.
Prior to making this drink it is always important to test the tequila before using it in the mix. Although the agave tequilas are popular today, they tend to be inconsistent in alcohol content. So, chill a shot and down it before preparing the rest of the ingredients. As a regular drinker you will likely be able to tell if it is “regular strength”. On second thought have a second shot. This will ensure that your drinkers will feel the proper effect of the tequila.
As you are chopping the watermelon, be sure that you can see properly, as you will likely be wielding a larger knife. If you are over 40 and need “readers” in order to focus on the edge of the knife – do put them on. To stay in the spirit of things, hook them over your neck with your Mexican Goddess beaded glasses holder. As you recall you got these Chantico goddess beads on vacation in Mexico with your last boyfriend…..he was fun. Have another shot to really focus your hand on the cutting and chopping.
Put the chopped watermelon aside. Next snip off 16 fresh basil leaves. Don’t slip on the watermelon juice that dripped off the counter…as a matter of fact to be on the safe side…. take the time to properly wipe up the puddle of juice and then reward yourself with another small shot of tequila.
Next drop all ingredients into blender. If your glasses fall off the top of your head, because you forgot that you had the glasses holder for them and they land in the blender, and the friggin’ Chantico goddess beads get caught in the blender and jam the whole thing up…and even more importantly now the entire batch is contaminated with cheap glass bead shards from the “nice gift” from your as*hole boyfriend that could never buy you anything nice anyway……don’t worry! Stay calm. Have another small shot to relieve the stress and anger and just let it all go. You have enough ingredients to make more…because come on…who really plans on making only one batch of margaritas? Am I right?
Discard all of initial batch. Take pitcher on blender apart. Untangle what is left of the beads and dollar-store readers from the blades. Reward your self with another small shot because you broke up with that cheap bastard that made you pay for half of that Mexican getaway anyway. What the hell did you ever see him????
Begin again with fresh batch of ingredients. R4ally really focus now….as things are beginning to look…a litter Ad….tgtjerewthofsa Thenakjodnon djnd laoijan kjdid uua djkdnooa dk,jd arrw appaldnkln………..
No really focus. No Joke you must focus here….you have to make it to the front door. It is the fire department pounding on the front door…Your neighbor called them because your kitchen curtains are on fire…..
Note here: don’t forget to flip the tostada. At this point, forget the margaritas…have another teeny-tiny shot and a few spoonful’s of refried beads and log on to your eharmony account.